Tingling Penis

Haven't been riding much. Dog took sick. As he got worse I spent more time with him. The wife suggested I bring the bike in and put it on the trainer. I don't want to do that. You see I have a little problem with the trainer. Not that it's boring sitting on a trainer, in the basement, riding to nowhere. No, that's the good part. Trainer sessions have been leaving me with a bit of a problem. See
I can ride with hemorrhoids. I can ride with arthritis pain in my knee. I will even ride with a migraine. I won't spend one minute on a bike if my junk is going to get numb. Because we all know what comes after the numbness. Yes, the tingling. I hate that. I hate it so much I refuse to sit on the damn bike. Here's the problem. Somehow my seat's position has changed. My first guess would be that it has given way under my lard-ass. It hasn't moved enough to cause the most feared condition in the world to occur when riding around outside. Only when locked in place in my basement. Curious?

After 10 long minutes on the trainer -- and everyone who has used one knows that 10 minutes feels like 1 hour -- I get the strange feeling I'm not feeling my Johnson. Nihilists could cut off my Johnson and I wouldn't know it. 10 minutes, that's odd. I go out on the road for an hour or so and everything is fine. But 10 minutes on the trainer and I can't take it anymore.

Like an idiot I adjusted my seat. No change on the trainer. Change on the road though. You got it, numbness. I went crazy with the tingling. There I was standing on the side of the road, hand down my shorts and jumping around like a Kansas City hooker. I'm surprised I didn't get arrested.

Now my seat was all facaca (fah-kah-kah). I stopped into the local bike shop to ask for some help. The guy sat me on this cool device made from memory foam. My sits bones made an indentation in the foam. The tech found the indentations and measured the distance between the dimples. The best part: he tried to sell me a new seat. Prick.  I didn't buy it and went back to adjusting my seat. So now I'm back to being OK on the road. I haven't tried the trainer yet. I need to work up a little courage first.